Day 20: Rotting away

I'm so bored. I hate the mornings. I'm up because the nurses don't stop bothering me, but when they do I'm awake anyway. I'm not hungry, just thirsty. I want to go shopping. I want to eat fresh movie popcorn. I want someone to take me out on a date. I want to drive aimlessly around OKC listening to music on my ipod and discover new cool places. I want to eat at a sit down restaurant. I want to go to wal-mart and wander around and buy things I don't need only because they're on sale. I just don't want to be stuck in my room anymore. especially in this annoying bed. ugh.

I'm waiting on a nurse to come in so I can ask her my blood counts for today but after about 8am, they leave me alone for a bit. So as soon as I get those I will let you all know if I've made more progress today. My back is still in pain and it still hurts to move. And on top of this the other day I was sitting at my chair in the "living" area. In front of my chair was an ottoman and beside me there was another chair and ottoman. And of course I surrounded myself with BOTH ottomans. One for my feet and one for whatever I was drinking or eating at the time. So I get up, lose my balance, and for some reason I just could not move my feet, I couldn't catch myself, I couldn't do anything. it was a really weird fall but luckily I landed on one of the ottomans and somehow a corner of something caught my right upper side of my leg and now.....a nasty bruise is there and I'm pretty sure there is a knot too. So point of my story, the left side of my hip (bascially lower back) hurts....AND the right side of my right leg. So it makes getting out of bed, moving around in bed, and just walking in general, just terrible. poor me.

So my doctor came in this morning and he told me that after the bone marrow biopsy, they still found some leukemia. So this means that yes I will have to go through more Chemo. This time it will be a 7 day treatment with different kind of chemo drugs. One is Ara-c and the other....i don't remember what he said. Then I'll have to recover and get another bone marrow biopsy and hope that i'll go into remission. He didn't talk much about after that because I'm sure it would confuse me. I asked him about the bone marrow biopsy but he said if I got into remission, then relapse 18 months later or something THEN i'll have to get a transplant.

So basically, until I get my count update, not a lot going on today. My mom is going to go home today so I'll be here by myself for the day. Maybe I do some situps or something because I feel like I'm way out of shape.....23 days in a hospital is just crazy talk.

I love you all, have a happy Thursday! :)

Kim