Day 24: One Month CAN literally Feel Like One Million Years

I didn't know how to break this....i struggled between facebook or blog....facebook or blog.....facebook or BLOG.....FACEBOOK or BLOG....and that literally how it went it my head (like in the movies when they actually have an important life changing decision to make....lol.

Well around these hospital parts, I have to create my own and blow things out of proportion because when your sitting around here.....why not? it's way to boring not too, especially when no one is looking. It keeps you sane.


ANYways, no real "clear update" on my HCB (counts)....My Oncologist is kind of like a tornado sometimes and just talks, talks, talks, says "any questions?" leaves a 1 second gap....and walks out. But other days he's here to chat so I can usually tell when he's busy or not.

Anyways, sorry about my rant last night about my 5k cold turkey run. I guess I understand a lot of concerns but believe me I know my body more than ever (especially if i was running around here with a 3.8 hemoglobin) and signs that I will be "familiar" with if I need something. I won't be "scared" or "embarrassed" to stop like I usually am when I ran the many 5k's, 8k's, 10k's, half marathons, or full marathons. I understand I'm in a WHOLE different ballpark.....but if you know me, telling me I can't do something just fuels a natural drive I (or any equally or as competitive) person that I am. I will finish. I will try my best. I will listen to my body. I will walk if I think need to. I know my family will be proud and these will be one of those inspiring moments I will live on to tell my children, my team I'll coach as a pep talk, and OF COURSE...my family to "ONE UP" them because we often get into those types of arguments and by me saying...."so (as I tug my pants up) "I once ran a 5k (insert my brother laughing hysterically here....after he stops) without running for 2 1/2 month (brother: please I run them everyday) AND without doing any type of physical activity beside remote flipping, computer typing and walking to and from a shower/counch/restroom. (he'll chuckle) then....(here's the kickline) I got out of the hospital on a Tuesday, and trained by walking more, a light jog here or two, and completed a 5k on a Sunday morning............with cancer, a blood cancer at that."

oh that punch line is oh so sweet!! :)

So if you read that entire story and KNOW my family, you'll understand the sweet smell of victory to just put everyone in their place and ever since I can imagine I've always competed through tae-kwon-do forms and fightings, casual running on any given day of the week with my sister that always turned into competition, the treadmill race I got into with everyone and ANYONE on the treadmill and me thinking (HA!! I've been on the treadmill longer than you!) I often had hour long runs just to prove a point, the gross eating food contest I always never entered but watch my brother win victorious, the "who can keep their arms straight out in front of them the longest" in the long car rides we were bored (I always lost), and of course the traditional stuff, soccer games, track meets, bball games, x-country meets, cheerleading, and softball games....so just all these funny things just kinda make me want my brother or sister to run this with me but it's also symbolic that I have a MILLION supporters watching my journey and cheering me on but I can only do it myself and feel good for myself for actually doing it.

ON to the good news that I'm sure that MOST of you all figured out....I'm getting DISCHARGED TODAY!!! :) I'm FREEEEEEEEEEE.................................for a week, then I'll be back for another round of Chemo but I thought this day would NEVER come. I'm glad it's here and I'm ready.
Today's agenda is gathering all my stuff and moving it down to the car, go wig shopping (b/c my insurance is awesome and covers up to $150 in wigs caused by medical stuff....there is actually a technical term but i don't remember or want to get up to look at it....but I'm running a 5k on sunday, LOL) then I'll probably go to forever 21 or somewhere to buy a few scarves and jewelry I can wear when I come back. stocking caps and all the unnecessary things but I still need.

whew. i have a full day ahead of me but I'm hungry.....great, this is NOT good.

Anyways, thanks for reading and thanks for having or at least trying to have a good attitude for my 5k. Just know it means a lot to me and like I said please don't worry because I know my body so much more than ever and I know my limits. Please don't worry I've have other Tafties out there who would be more than willing to sacrifice their time (sarah....lol) to make sure that I get to where I'm going. :)

I love you all....but I need to start cleaning....ASAP. :)

xooxoxo

Kim


also thank you for those who have been reading since I've been here and traveled this FIRST journey with me. I'll continue to blog everyday while I'm at home but there will be no guarantees it will be as comical. But I'll do my best :)