I'm tired. it's about 11:23pm and I just got back from the Taft Teacher Softball games. I think they lost both (LOL, what a fan I am) but that's okay. I was just so happy to see everyone and function in "normal" society for a while before I go back. I definitely took a minute or two to take a "snapshot" of everything....the wind blowing, the people screaming, the kids crying, and the just being in the company of others. I guess it's an even trade for me....missing the social life for saving my life. But it's just depressing being in the hospital (especially since I may not have the penthouse suite) and not being able to do anything. I'm usually a busy body person trying to help out in anyway I can with anyone. I generally don't like being alone (unless I need my "ME" time) and I usually found myself always thinking about work (school) 24/7. I love what I do and I just miss being around my students, my soccer boys, and my co-workers. Of course, they come to me in the hospital but it's just not the same. I feel like I'm on "display" and everything is about me....it sounds weird "saying" it out loud but just know that I'm making complete sense. LOL. :)
Well 5k is on sunday.....I only ran/walk twice. I might get out tomorrow after my daily medical visit and do a mile or two....I need to run the entire thing to see if it's even possible for me to run the whole thing but, I'm a wee bit too late so I'm just going to be a trooper and completely wing it. I figured since I'll be going to the hospital anyway on Monday and I'll have access to all the recovery "drugs" I'll be needing, why not push it to the limit?? lol. The only thing I'm really concerned about is the cold weather. The rain I can handle (mainly because I only hated running in the rain b/c my hair would get wet and heavy and annoy me, but now that I don't have hair, i don't have that obstacle to worry about) but the cold air going down the throat and to my lungs may kinda hurt. Usually after runs I have a terrible cough for a few days because I run with my mouth open (and always have). I'm afraid with the chemo going and my doctor being concerned. SO i'll be at the start line with a mask on and possible a back up in my pocket to hopefully take away the sting I usually feel.
So if anyone wants to watch me FINISH a 5k.....gun start time is 6:40am so I'll be finishing up around...7:20am?? but I'd be there at 7am juuuuuuust in case I decide to go ALL out and completely out do myself. LOL. OH and don't worry....if you sleep in I plan on running with my camera and taking pictures as I run (my sister usually does that during half marathons) to help literally, capture the moments so I can add it to my "journey" album I'm creating. :) YAY!
I'm excited to run because secretly i love running and that's all i know to do during "hard times." I've been being extra cautious and anal about being sanitary so let's hope my blood counts are UP tomorrow so I won't be admitted. ANYWAYS, it's now 11:43 and I'm done heating my back (it's STILL sore from day 1 of my run/walk series) and I'm tired.
Love you all and thanks for being so supportive as I take on this crazy 5k.....cold turkey.
I'm blessed to even be able to do it. And I will one day look back at this and shake my head and say "why kim. you're crazy"................but that's what makes it more oh-so-exciting.
Goodnight.
Kim
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